Since Landon has been here, I have been writing him letters about his days. I have been telling him what he’s done, silly things he has said, and memories we have made as a family here in Arizona. This is the first year I have done this for him and I wish I had done it in previous years. I am turning the letters into a scrapbook along with pictures so that when he is older, he will always have those memories. Being able to take a walk down memory lane is something that is really important to me so I want all of my children, including Landon, to have this experience… which got me to thinking… why not start now? So, with that being said, I decided to start writing to my kid(s). Im writing one now, one when I am told that I am in fact pregnant by my IVF doctor, one after the birth and then after that… I’m thinking maybe milestones? Once a month? Once every 6 months? I haven’t decided on that part yet.. but I have time to think J
With all that I have been going through, I decided to share my first letter and put it out there for everyone to see. I hope that someday my kid(s) will read this letter and smile knowing that their Mom loved them so much before they were even a ripple in the Petri dish.
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June 23, 2011
~My Dear Sweet Baby(s)~
This is my first letter to you and there will be many more to come. While I haven’t met you yet… or felt you move… or even seen you on a monitor… I want you to know that I love you more than words. I have been blessed with a unique opportunity to fall in love with you not only because I am your Mother, but because I am being forced to go to the ends of the earth to get you here with me. I am not yet pregnant with you but I can see your face(s), feel the touch of your soft skin, see your smile, and hear your laughter. I can see your Daddy’s face light up every time he sees you. Some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. I have prayed for you to come naturally for years, but I think that this plan was what was in store for me and I am thankful for it now. It has made me a better person inside. You and I have a special relationship… one that can’t be compared to any other. I love you for extra special reasons.. reasons that most mommy’s are not blessed with and for that I am thankful. It will be mine and your Daddy’s job in your life to make sure that you understand what life is all about… to help you and guide you through all the ups and downs. You don’t even know it yet, but you have shown me a side of life that I never knew existed …already. I promise to return the favor and guide you through life everyday. A very smart man named Albert Einstein once said, "Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts." I have been able to see this situation as a positive one and I feel you in my heart always. It is YOU who is getting me through this. My first life lesson for you is to never give up. Don’t ever think you can’t, because you can. You can do anything you put your mind to. I learned this from your Grandma, but I have learned a whole new side of this now, more than ever.
I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always. As long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be.
Love,
Mommy.
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